My Big Fat Face

My Big Fat Face

I have finally come back to face the music. I went on a month long vacation (way too long, just by the way) and just couldn’t bring myself to step on the scale when I got home. I knew things weren’t good because every time I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror I noticed how much rounder my face looked. I just didn’t want to know the number. I am a big believer in avoidance. If I can ignore a problem long enough it just might go away. But that round face just kept showing up. I avoided this website. I didn’t post on it, I didn’t comment and I eventually stopped reading. Seriously, checking in here just made it that much harder to avoid the round face that was stalking me. Soon I started eating more because, if I am not going to try to lose weight I might as well have some chocolate, right? This morning was the worst. I actually made a point not to look in the mirror. I took my kids to the park and visited with people in my neighborhood all without having a clue how I looked. When I got home I started looking for more food, just to keep me from thinking about that face and the number behind it. Finally I gave up. I trudged upstairs and I stepped on the scale.

It’s bad. Not only have I gained back all the weight I had lost, I also tacked on 5 more pounds just for fun. I now weigh 275 lbs. Yikes. Is that classic dieting behavior or what? But I have to say, now that I know the damage and I know that I have 10 months or so before I see my family in the US again, I feel motivated. This is new for me. Before, I wanted to be motivated, I pretended to be motivated, I knew I should be motivated, but I wasn’t. Now I feel like kickin’ some butt. So, here is my plan for this week. I will eat a better breakfast and lunch (dinners are pretty good) and stop the late night snacking. I will ride the stationary bike that has been mocking me. Finally, I will find and purchase one work out DVD and have tried it out before next Wednesday when I check in.

Sorry I flaked. I promise to better.

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7 responses to “My Big Fat Face

  1. It can be so tough. I also tend to avoid this site, even though I was so excited to join. Hang in there. And it just doesn’t seem fair how fast the weight can pack on, and how long it takes to come off. But I’m there with you. Together we can surprise each other on your next visit! We’ll talk!

  2. There’s no need to apologize. You only answer to yourself. We’re here to support you. I for one am really proud of you for facing reality and making a plan for taking positive steps in the next week.

  3. Hooray for motivation! Hooray for facing up to taking good care of yourself!

    And holy moly, I had to look at that picture of you three times before I could be sure that you were not my little sister. Also named Amy!

  4. I think you’re doing great by owning up and making a plan. Yea Amy!

  5. I’m so with you on this feeling! I finally faced up to things a few days ago and the weight is already starting to come off!

    Best workout DVD I’ve found (for my style), is the walk away the pounds series. Love ’em! There’s 1, 2, and 3 mile versions, so you can pace yourself and work your way up. I’ve found them a good way to start, since my aerobic abilities are pretty much non-existent.

    The roundness of face is often a sign of water retention. Increasing your water intake is annoying because of the many bathroom trips in the first week, but it’s sooo worth it! For me, the weight comes off twice as fast when I’m hitting my goal of a gallon a day.

    Not eating after dinner? Also makes a huuuuge difference. It usually takes me a week of perseverance before the tummy rumbles stop, and then it’s a nice habit (which, alas, I often ruin!)

    Good luck to you, babe! You can so do this!

  6. I put on 7 lbs over Christmas and New Years, and was feeling so discouraged. But I lost 6 lbs the first week – a lot of it was water retention. I made a huge pot of vegetable soup (onion, celery, cabbage, carrot, broccoli, cauliflower, green beans, canned tomatoes and vegetable broth) and kept it in the fridge. I ate it for one meal a day, and whenever I was really hungry between meals, for the whole first week. It had next to no calories, but it filled me up and really helped me get over the first bump.

    YOu can totally do this! Go you!

  7. Jen is right. You were off the wagon and now you are back on. Getting back on is the most important part.

    You go girl! Vacation is over now and you have support here!

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