What a Tool

Been absent for a few days… sorry about that.  I’m pretty sure that I have been a little depressed.  Kinda snuck up on me.

My girlfriend from down the street died last week.  She had been fighting cervical cancer for over a year, but the end of November came with the worst of news, and now she’s gone.  Frankly, it has hit me way harder than I thought it would; not so much grieving for her (I believe she is in a great place with a lot of exciting work ahead of her) but for her husband and three kids.  Her youngest is the same age as my oldest, and they play together.

I finally realised that I was depressed after spending an inordinate amount of time watching old, downloaded episodes of Buffy The Vampire Slayer.  Also after my third piece of cheesecake in a three day period of time.  I went over my points last week.

But not THAT far over my points.  And here is the point to this post… emotions cause my body to hold onto poundage like CRAZY.  Tuesday evening I weighed-in at my WW meeting at a whopping four and a half pounds heavier.  HUH!??  Because while I did eat more than I should have, according to my calculations, it was about right for holding steady, not packing on a substantial gain.  On top of that, the only workout that I missed was the actual day of the funeral.  So again… huh.  I think it’s my inner emo coming out to listen to my iPod, drink Cherry Coke Zero and chub up.  Oh yeah… the resolution to quit diet soda got flushed as well.

Seriously, in my mid twenties I got divorced and put on over forty pounds in five months.  I got stretch marks on my tummy, and utterly freaked out my endocrinologist who ordered an entire battery of tests.  I wasn’t so surprised.  I have known for years. I am an emotional gainer, and it really sucks; but it is nice to be conscious of it happening this time, and have a few tools to deal wit it, and minimize the damage.

1. Weight Watchers… hey, I’m paying for it, you better believe I’m gonna keep going.  They offer support and encouragement, and that’s what a girl needs to get her past the rough patches!
2. Bootcamp… the women I workout with twice a week (esp. the gal who leads it).  I would be deeply ashamed to quit at this point.
3. Running… it is hard to do, but makes me feel better, and I have a secret goal.
4. This blog… I don’t necessarily comment every day (long story about downloads, firewalls and browsers), but I read it religiously.
5. My husband, his support and sense of humor.

I am sure there are other tools I could be using.  What do you do to get by?


7 responses to “What a Tool

  1. Stress is definitely a huge factor in rapid weight gain. So sorry about your friend!

    When the body gets stressed out, it retains water. Upping your water intake will help those extra few pounds come off more quickly. Your body needs reassurance that it has a continual supply of water before it’ll let go of its reserves.

    Sounds like you have some incredible tools on your side!

  2. Stress and grief are strange things. why are our bodies so responsive to weight? Mine does very weird things but I figure if I just keep running it will all work itself out:)

    Good for you, keeping at it! and I’m sorry about your friend:(

  3. I’m so sorry about your loss.

    It appears that you have a good handle on what you need to be doing and, as you’re ready, you’ll do those things. Hang in there and keep us posted.

  4. What I’m trying to teach myself is that weight loss is a journey. There will be good and bad times. We are not mechanical instruments that can keep a constant effort up with perfect results. But we can learn from each leg of our journey and apply those lessons to our next jaunt.

    Three pieces of cheesecake in three days? I agree with you, very minimal. When I’m depressed I can eat three pieces in an hour.

    Ways to cope with depression – don’t isolate yourself. Get out and do things with friends, family, kids, even if you don’t want to. Being “out” with others always gives my spirit a lift, once I’ve done it. Kind of like exercising. The hardest part is starting, but I feel so good emotionally when I have finished.

    My condolences to you. Even though she’s so much better off, those left behind still feel her absence.

  5. You’ll probably find those pounds all come off at once in a week or two – it’s water, not fat. I’m so impressed that you’ve kept with the running and exercise, I’m finding it hard to get into a groove with that right now.

    I’m really sorry about your friend.

  6. I am so sorry about your friend.

    I think your tools are GREAT and it is what is going to keep you on track (or get you back on track).

  7. I work out with two much thinner friends, one of whom is in fantastic shape, not that the other is too shabby herself. This really helps keep me motivated. I also look at my three year old and think of how much more fun I will be for him when I lose the pounds and I’ve been able to keep it up.

    Well, for two weeks anyway. But that is ages for me, as I don’t think I’ve stuck with anything for longer than a few days for quite a while now.

    On a side note, I love Buffy. I’m actually watching my Angel DVDs on the days I walk on the treadmill at home. I figure when I work all the way through that series I’ll move on to Buffy. It sure makes a 40+ minute walk go by quickly.

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