Been absent for a few days… sorry about that. I’m pretty sure that I have been a little depressed. Kinda snuck up on me.
My girlfriend from down the street died last week. She had been fighting cervical cancer for over a year, but the end of November came with the worst of news, and now she’s gone. Frankly, it has hit me way harder than I thought it would; not so much grieving for her (I believe she is in a great place with a lot of exciting work ahead of her) but for her husband and three kids. Her youngest is the same age as my oldest, and they play together.
I finally realised that I was depressed after spending an inordinate amount of time watching old, downloaded episodes of Buffy The Vampire Slayer. Also after my third piece of cheesecake in a three day period of time. I went over my points last week.
But not THAT far over my points. And here is the point to this post… emotions cause my body to hold onto poundage like CRAZY. Tuesday evening I weighed-in at my WW meeting at a whopping four and a half pounds heavier. HUH!?? Because while I did eat more than I should have, according to my calculations, it was about right for holding steady, not packing on a substantial gain. On top of that, the only workout that I missed was the actual day of the funeral. So again… huh. I think it’s my inner emo coming out to listen to my iPod, drink Cherry Coke Zero and chub up. Oh yeah… the resolution to quit diet soda got flushed as well.
Seriously, in my mid twenties I got divorced and put on over forty pounds in five months. I got stretch marks on my tummy, and utterly freaked out my endocrinologist who ordered an entire battery of tests. I wasn’t so surprised. I have known for years. I am an emotional gainer, and it really sucks; but it is nice to be conscious of it happening this time, and have a few tools to deal wit it, and minimize the damage.
1. Weight Watchers… hey, I’m paying for it, you better believe I’m gonna keep going. They offer support and encouragement, and that’s what a girl needs to get her past the rough patches!
2. Bootcamp… the women I workout with twice a week (esp. the gal who leads it). I would be deeply ashamed to quit at this point.
3. Running… it is hard to do, but makes me feel better, and I have a secret goal.
4. This blog… I don’t necessarily comment every day (long story about downloads, firewalls and browsers), but I read it religiously.
5. My husband, his support and sense of humor.
I am sure there are other tools I could be using. What do you do to get by?