My Tale

Hmmmmmm.  Where do I start?

When I was a kid, I was a pudgy little thing.  In high school, I got so busy with band activities that I never ate.  I was a size 5 and weighed about 100 lbs when I graduated.  I seriously consider myself to have been anorexic back then, and if I had pictures on the P.C. to show you, I would.

Shortly after high school I became pregnant with my first child.  I got married and by the time I delivered I weighed about 190.  Getting pregnant truly cured any eating disorder tendencies I had!  After having D, I got myself back down to about 120 and a size 7.  I got divorced, remarried and happy.  That’s where all the changes started.

I got pregnant with B and gained 35 lbs with him.  I never really lost that weight and slowly started packing on the pounds.  By the time I had M, I weighed 223.  Luckily I only gained 12 lbs with her, but still.  I joined WW shortly after I had her and lost down to 190.  Then we moved.

When we moved, I had a minor nervous breakdown.  I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism in 2002 and have struggled with high weight since then.  I had another baby in 2005, again only gaining about 12 lbs (why is it the boys make me gain sooooooooo much weight?).  With each girl, I have lost what I gained quickly.  I just can’t go any further afterwards.

Here it is 2 years after K was born and I still look pregnant.  I’ve got those arms that keep waving long after my hand is done, those chins that have their own zip code, and lets not even talk about the badonkadonk that follows me around on a daily basis.  I’m so done!

I want to lose weight, really I do.  I want to be around for my kids.  I’m tired of being the fat mom at the dance competitions.  You know, the ones the trophy moms look at and think “She’s got her child in this b/c she could never do it.”.  I want to look good again!

I just wish it was as easy as blinking my eyes ala Jennie style.

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10 responses to “My Tale

  1. I think we all dream of finding an easy way. The awesome think of this group here, is that we’re all finding our own ways, and sharing them here. Different things work for different people, and I’m excited because I feel like here, I’ll learn what works for me. Good luck to you!

  2. We’re here for ya! I think it counts just to WANT to do it. You sound like you’re well past wanting. Let’s get skinny!

  3. I wish there were an easy way too. But, it took time for each of us to get to our current sizes and it will take time to get to our goals. We’re all in this together and we’ll be here to cheer you on, every pound of the way.

  4. Wouldn’t it be nice if there was some magic pill that would allow us to wake up skinny? Oh, how I have longed for that.

    Wanting to change is half the battle and I’m right there with you. Let’s do this together!!!

  5. You mean we’re NOT supposed to look permanently pregnant? Seriously? Hmmm… I’d better rethink my strategy. I’m glad you joined us :>

  6. OH! That feeling of being The Fat Mom with my sweet kids ANYWHERE! I know exactly what you mean. You can almost hear the judgements those divamoms are thinking. Um… or maybe it’s just in MY head!

  7. I hope the support we can give each other makes the difference. I find it much easier to write about my weight problems here than to talk about them. In New York I am surrounded by women who lament how fat they are when they weigh 120 lbs. or less.
    I am so glad you joined us.

  8. I echo Mary Joan. It’s easier for me to write than to speak. Which is why this Fluff-Club is the mose fantanbulous idea ever. Thanks Sue!

  9. Don’t we all have things we are sure people think about us? I am sure that people see my husband and I and think, “Isn’t it nice that they found each other?” As in, who else would have them? I just want to open my husband’s wallet and say, “We were cute see?” But the truth is, they are too busy worrying about what we are thinking about them.

  10. I totally relate to the whole “fat mom at the dance competition” thing. My kids are all very thin, and in great shape, and when we are at the competitions, I feel uncomfortable like I’m being judged for my weight. (I’m secretly kind of smug when DD places ahead of those girls with the trophy moms 🙂

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